TMT: Cheating is Losing

TMT: Cheating is Losing
November 19, 2013 10 Comments Writing Stephanie Ayers

This week’s Twisted MixTape Tuesday is about cheating. I have some experience in this, unfortunately. My last experience left me working harder to be the kind of wife I should have been (because I wasn’t) so that he wouldn’t be seeking (emotional) comfort elsewhere. I’m not saying I was to blame, because I wasn’t. It just opened my eyes to what I was doing wrong. It’s still a long journey to rebuild what was damaged in the process, but we are a long way from where we were.

Anyway, this week’s mixtape was a little hard for me, and I’m not sure which direction it will take, or even sure what songs will pop up on it, but, I love putting these together so there’s that…

As I’ve stated before, I’m an avid Carrie Underwood fan. She’s got some songs about cheating. I love the haunting tones of this particular one and the lyrics really get me too.

This particular song really gets me in the gut because its something I have thought about more than once in the not-so-distant past, especially when I discovered that the jewelry receipt I found for the purchase of a necklace I had asked for went to “the other woman” and texts between them that ended with “Luv you” and “U too”…

Which totally led me to wonder…

The last verse Hellogoodbye sings in this song has played out in my head more than once. In fact, I can still imagine HER kissing him based on her body position in a picture someone snapped of them and was dumb enough to give him, and he in turn was dumb enough to keep under his visor…

While I know that she was the one who chased him, she had a terribly messed up life that he “rescued her from”. Velvet Underground has a song about loving someone you can’t have and I can still hear her words in my head “He’s my best friend, and you won’t ever change that.” as if her friendship trumped my marriage…

And then there’s all the lies he told that still twist my stomach in knots when he’s running a bit later than expected…

Regardless, this was a horrible experience and there are still things I struggle with, especially since she won’t just go away. I find it really hard to…

There’s gotta be hope to rebuild somewhere in music history, right?

And although this song isn’t about cheating, I think P!nk’s got some hope that I can relate to based on my experience.

And that’s another Twisted MixTape Tuesday.

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Stephanie Ayers A published author with a knack for twisted tales, Stephanie Ayers is the Executive Creative Director of OWS Ink, LLC, a community for writers and readers alike. She loves a good thriller, fairies, things that go bump in the night, and sappy stories. When she is not writing, she can be found in Creative Cloud designing book covers and promotional graphics for authors.
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  1. 10 Comments

    Angela Death

    I wish people would realize the psychological damage they cause when they cheat.

    Reply
    1. 10 Comments

      SAM

      it really does screw with your head.

      Reply
  2. 10 Comments

    Jessica West

    This couldn’t have been easy to share, but I’m glad you did. Too often, people look at this kind of scenario and automatically think they have the cheater and his/her spouse pegged. I think you may have set a few stereotypes straight with this one. Kudos for the bravado it took to relive the pain enough to write about it.

    Reply
    1. 10 Comments

      SAM

      With pain comes healing and the discovery of some of these songs did me good.

      Reply
  3. 10 Comments

    Clark Scottroger

    good set of songs….good Post!

    you know, I’ve been seeing ‘Pale Blue Eyes’ on ‘the circuit’ this week… funny how you can like and listen to a group (Velvet Underground) for years and miss a major song entirely!

    (listened to it here on your Post)

    Reply
    1. 10 Comments

      SAM

      I think it’s probably due to the loss of Lou Reed.

      Reply
  4. 10 Comments

    Dream

    I’m not familiar with a couple of these, but love the Velvet Underground. I wish you the best on continuing your journey to mend your relationship. It takes a certain kind of strength to put in the work to forgive someone after trust is broken and I admire you for that.

    Reply
    1. 10 Comments

      SAM

      its a daily struggle sometimes I’m not convinced I will win.

      Reply
  5. 10 Comments

    Jen

    Wow, thank you for sharing such a heart wrenching experience. We all know music and writing can be cathartic. I hope this was. Your songs were a perfect fit. Thank you so much.

    Reply
  6. 10 Comments

    Scorpio Scribes

    Your list feels spot on, each song really evokes the precise emotion you mention. Your dedication and loyalty to your husband and family awes me. I truly hope he realizes how blessed he is and can chalk this up to a learning experience. I know first hand how strong those feelings of anger and hurt are. Anymore it is so easy to throw around cliches such “once a cheater, always a cheater” or tell the victim they deserve better but sometimes, sometimes things can be fixed, sometimes a mistake is a mistake…sometimes men are just stupid…but what we have with them is worth fighting for and worth fixing…and that is something only we can decide. On a side note, I sang “Does He Love You” with another girl at a talent show in 8th grade…forever long ago…

    Reply

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