The Huntsman

It was his first kill. It had looked him square in the eye as the bullet penetrated its heart. Sometimes when the moon was full and a chill bit the air, like tonight, Kyle would see the buck standing along the tree line, staring. Despite his warm house, cold crept through the house. Kyle eyed the buck head that peered menacingly down on him. Suddenly, the buck appeared outside, smoke billowing from its snout. He picked up his rifle and aimed the barrel at his heart. Words flew softly from his lips as the bullet shredded Kyle’s heart.

“I’m sorry.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The idea is to tell a story in 100 words. This week’s theme was “Haunting.”

Did I do it? Feel free to share your honest opinions in a comment. I appreciate and welcome your feedback!

Thanks for stopping in!

ShotgunWikipedia: A shotgun (also known as a scattergun and peppergun, or historically as a fowling piece) is a firearm that is usually designed to be fired from the shoulder, which uses the energy of a fixed shell to fire a number of small spherical pellets called shot, or a solid projectile called a slug.

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Stephanie Ayers

Executive Creative Director at Our Write Side/OWS Ink, LLC
A published author with a knack for twisted tales, Stephanie Ayers is the Executive Creative Director of OWS Ink, LLC, a community for writers and readers alike. She loves a good thriller, fairies, things that go bump in the night, and sappy stories. When she is not writing, she can be found in Creative Cloud designing book covers and promotional graphics for authors.
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16 thoughts on “The Huntsman”

  1. Carrie says:

    It’s a little confusing as to where exactly Kyle is looking and who gets shot with the gun. I’m assuming Kyle kills himself over remorse over killing the deer…but I’m not sure.

    1. SAM says:

      You got it right. He’s looking out the window of his trophy room, then he looks at the deer head on the wall and the buck appears beyond. It was 204 words so I had to cut. Thanks for letting me know. I will mull over it and fix it.

      1. Carrie says:

        tricky stuff, these 100 word flashes

        1. SAM says:

          Yes, and I am out of shape! Wow!

          1. SAM says:

            And fixed!

  2. The Real Cie says:

    Chilling!

    1. SAM says:

      Thanks!

  3. troy P. says:

    Loved the pace and the story overall – having a sight issue trying to imagine the logistics involved in a self-inflicted heart shot with a shot gun. Can that be done? Or would the use of “gun” alone, made it easier to visualize?

    1. SAM says:

      I honestly don’t know. I’ve only fired a gun once and that was many years ago. Perhaps rifle is the better word?

  4. LaTonya M. Baldwin says:

    First thought same as Troy. Still enjoyed.

    1. SAM says:

      Thanks, LaTonya. I switched it out to rifle. I hope that works better. Thanks for taking time to read it and comment! I really appreciate it.

  5. My Chaotic Factors says:

    Sam, I am a a little with Carrie on this one. I had to read it a few times to get to where to say it was with 204 words. I think the repetition of “the buck” (the one inside versus the one outside) so close together is what threw me off. Also, I thought that the “I’m sorry” was more of his saying sorry to the buck for taking its life while Kyle’s heart was more metaphorically being shredded by his actions. I guess when my confusion takes more than 100 words to explain, I should stop. Sorry!

    1. SAM says:

      I actually rewrote it, so I’m sorry its still confusing. I am a bit out of practice at the 100 word things, LOL. Your take on his I’m sorry was him apologizing to the buck. I like the idea of Kyle’s heart being shredded by his actions. Its a nice metaphor.

      As for adding the picture, I went to the site and right clicked “Copy image location” then I clicked Add Image at the top of my post and clicked “from url.” I pasted the url of the image in that spot and below that it will ask for the url to the post. I clicked on the post itself and copied the url from the address bar, then I pasted it as a “custom url” in the appropriate space. I hope that helps!

      Thank you so much for taking the time to leave a comment. It really means the world to me!

  6. My Chaotic Factors says:

    On an entirely different tack, could you kindly tell me how you got the cool 100 word challenge pic with the jump to its URL into your blog. I am very green at all of this.

  7. barbara says:

    maybe it’s because I live in Alaska – and we (as a state) hunt for our food . . . I’m not sure I’d be haunted. But that’s me. Then again . . . when we hit the deer in Ohio all I could see whenever I closed my eyes was the BIG BROWN EYES of the deer. 🙂 Glad to see you writing 100. 🙂

    1. SAM says:

      I need to get back involved. my muse is drying up. I hate summer. I’m anxious for school to start up already!

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