Feigned Innocence

Feigned Innocence
May 27, 2011 31 Comments Writing Stephanie Ayers

This was absolutely the last time he would ever lock her out again. It was double jeopardy time for the little man.

Going outside without permission was his first strike, but locking his mother out of the house when she made him come in was the last straw.  A purple vein ran down her forehead, throbbing with such intensity that it looked as if it were going to explode. Red flashed before her eyes, as she felt the rage bubble up like gas in her chest. Bam! Bam! Bam! Her fist screamed at the door. One minute, two minutes, three minutes. Click. Blue splotches, as if she’d looked into the sun too long, blurred her path as she stormed after her son.

Wise beyond his years, he had retreated to a corner when she came through the door. He ran to her bedroom. He turned the television on.

Innocence.

Perhaps if he acted nonchalant, the whole thing didn’t happen and she would love on him instead.

He was wrong.

I hope you enjoyed this little not-quite-fiction tale. It is inspired by my son, who did indeed lock me out this afternoon.  Have a laugh at my expense, then leave me some concrit.

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Stephanie Ayers A published author with a knack for twisted tales, Stephanie Ayers is the Executive Creative Director of OWS Ink, LLC, a community for writers and readers alike. She loves a good thriller, fairies, things that go bump in the night, and sappy stories. When she is not writing, she can be found in Creative Cloud designing book covers and promotional graphics for authors.
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  1. 31 Comments

    Stacey

    My kids have done this to me and it does make me very mad. We have had some very LONG time outs and groundings as a result! I think you did a great job conveying what the child would do after unlocking the door. Kids are so helpful sometimes!

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Thanks. He is usually more helpful than this. LOL.

      Reply
  2. 31 Comments

    Kim

    I have no doubt this is in my near future with an almost four year old and one year old. I already deal with antics such as my older son pulling down my pyjama pants and laughing wildly. Sigh. At least it made for a good post!

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      my son is 3.5. I’m sitting here scratching my head wondering where my good boy went….

      Reply
  3. 31 Comments

    cristina

    argh, my kid locked me in the basement one day, and when I demanded that he open the door, repeatedly, he would reply “I can’t, I’m too tired” Finally, my husband woke up from my screaming and I found the kid sitting on the couch chillin out! oh boy was I MAD!!! lol

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Do you look back and laugh now?

      Reply
  4. 31 Comments

    Carrie

    LOL, short and sweet…just like the culprit, right?

    I’m not sure what to suggest. Perhaps break it up into a couple of paragraphs? And you used purple twice within 2 sentences. Maybe find another way to describe the throbbing vein or the spotches on her face?

    I would have actually like more about when you first discovered you were locked out. Emotions, feelings, actions?

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Good catch, Carrie. Once I get this headache to go away, maybe I can expand on that more as you suggested.

      Reply
  5. 31 Comments

    NatureGirl

    I did have a good chuckle…thanks for being brave enough to share!

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Thanks for getting a little chuckle. I’m glad I could brighten your day.

      Reply
  6. 31 Comments

    Erin

    I just knew this wasn’t fiction! So well done!
    I had that happen once, my son locked me in the garage, I wad so mad that I stood there pounding on the door getting angrier and didn’t think to go out the garage and around to a different door! Took me about 5 minutes! So there ya go, a laugh at my expense!

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Except in my case, the other 2 doors were also locked.

      Reply
  7. 31 Comments

    Ashley

    What a little booger! Lol.

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Ha, that’s putting it nicely. 😉

      Reply
  8. 31 Comments

    kidfriendlyja

    Funny!
    Children they can press your last nerve!!
    Enjoyed this.

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      I don’t think I have any nerves left. Think they’ll grow back?

      Reply
  9. 31 Comments

    lori

    oh, the joys of motherhood! That whole second paragraph is my favorite, really well-written. I liked, “her fist screamed at the door” – Also, I really like the look of your site. I’ve been noticing everyone’s because I need to do a little work on mine 🙂

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Thank you. I actually just updated it with a fresh look that I have had in mind for awhile. I’m glad you stopped by!

      I appreciate your comments on the second paragraph. I added them at Carrie’s suggestion, and I’m glad I did. She was right. It does improve the story.

      Reply
  10. 31 Comments

    momfog

    Haha! I hate to laugh at another mother’s expense, but it is funny. I noticed the purple thing, too. That’s honestly the only thing I’d change. It was nice of the little guy to give you inspiration.

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Not sure what you mean now. I changed it? You should see purple, then red, then blue for colors. Are you seeing something different?

      And I could do without that kind of inspiration. 😉

      Reply
  11. 31 Comments

    Mandyland

    I’m sorry…I had to laugh, but only because I’ve been there!

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Sure, sure. Go ahead and laugh. 😛

      Reply
  12. 31 Comments

    Cheryl @ Mommypants

    My son – the 2 year-old – locked me out too! He thought it was hysterical. Thankfully, my husband was inside and let me in. Next time, I might not be so lucky!

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      Why do they think this is so funny?!? I guess it could be in hindsight. Makes me want to hang a key by every door to grab on my way out, LOL.

      Reply
  13. 31 Comments

    Janice

    Funny! So far, that hasn’t happened to me. I usually lock myself out. =/

    (stopping by from red writing hood!)

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      I’m sorry. You locking yourself out makes me giggle. I’ve done that too. Thanks for stopping by. I’ll be around soon.

      Reply
  14. 31 Comments

    CDG

    So far my son hasn’t locked me out, but my kid brother did once…

    Wicked children.

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      You are lucky, well at least that your son hasn’t.

      Reply
  15. 31 Comments

    Jessica Anne

    Hahaha! Sorry, but that’s funny. I love that he pretended to watch t.v. like nothing happened. Good plan. 🙂

    Reply
    1. 31 Comments

      DM

      He’s a good faker, that one. Stubborn as a mule, cute as a button, and great at the lock outs…

      Reply
  16. 31 Comments

    Georgia Girls

    Very fun! Sometimes, it is a very good thing children are cute — extends their mortality to another day. 🙂
    LOVE the striped witch legs in your header — made me smile.

    Reply

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