Easy Prey

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Easy Prey

March 7, 2012 Writing 26

I hadn’t planned to attend the reunion until I heard that he would be there: David Allen Coburn, Brighton High School’s star quarterback who wasted a professional career boozing it up. He ended up driving drunk, shattering his throwing shoulder and leaving a young girl paralyzed. He served some jail time but his hunched stance and dark, baggy eyes revealed the guilt that still haunted him. A haunted man makes for easy prey. It didn’t hurt that I was dressed to kill in a miniscule red slip of a dress, my long tanned legs ending in three inches of red leather pumps.

I licked my lips seductively and leaned in, allowing my breasts to brush against his jacket. I watched his eyes travel across my body, linger on my cleavage, and laughed when realization dawned on his face.

“Miranda Davis!” he said as his arms extended.“Wow! It’s great to see you.”

“David Coburn! Oh my God. I haven’t seen you in forever!” I said with mock glee, returning his embrace, feeling his body react to mine. I could see the jealousy written on the trivial faces of his old clique. I looked into his eyes with adoration, my full lips pursed in a deviant smile, and my voice subdued like a modern Marilyn Monroe. “You want get out of here? Go someplace less crowded?”

I caught his jaw before it hit the floor. He recovered quickly. “Yes,” his voice trailed on the “s” sounding like a viper in my ear. We turned our backs to the room and walked out arm in arm. I felt a smug smile lift my cheeks as we exited. I had no need to turn back. There was nothing back there I wanted. Nothing but revenge.

I followed David to the nearest hotel, and waited at the bar while he paid for a room. As he sauntered towards the lounge, I planted a lusty smile on my face. He stopped long enough to tell the bartender his room number and planted a wet kiss on my lips, his mouth open and his tongue searching. I bit him in the same instance I pushed away. He winced and a cloud of confusion crossed his face. Dammit. I hadn’t considered this. I would have to do a better job of hiding my disgust if I wanted this to work.

“What the hell!” David said. I let my nervousness bubble up and escape in a laugh.

“I’m sorry. I tend to get a little rough when I’m excited.” I grabbed his tie with both hands and pulled him towards me again. His mouth met mine eagerly and we were left breathless. We barely made it to the elevator before his hands glided across my body, his fingers hungry for uncovered flesh. If only he knew what was coming, perhaps he’d slow down. The anticipation of his fear turned me on, the adrenaline I needed to get through this.

I let him start so he’d think he was in control. Then the game changed completely as he found his hands handcuffed to the headboard. Helpless, he discovered just how rough I could be. I took all the liberties he’d taken with my best friend 15 years ago and more. His body was broken, bloodied, abused, and torn just as hers had been. I could smell the fear on him, but I needed to see it in his eyes. It wasn’t until I put the blade against his tool that I saw it. He had to learn this lesson and he had to live the fear like she had, even if it was only for 24 hours. I was even kind enough to leave him with a gun should he choose to end the pain as Sienna had done.

I sat in my car grateful that I went to the reunion. It hadn’t been easy facing the ghosts of my past and the monster that had destroyed my friend’s life, but I’d done it.

“You’re free at last, Sienna. You’re free at last.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the IndieInk Writing Challenge this week, jamelah challenged me with “It’s your 15-year high school class reunion, and you are sitting in your car in the parking lot.” and I challenged Diane with “Now let’s move on to Number Six.”

At StoryDam, this week we were to write a piece in which you or your character takes a stand and then takes action. SHOW US YOU MEAN BUSINESS!

This is also a part of the #3WW to use deviant, miniscule, and trivial in a story.

My sincerest thanks to Carrie, who edited this piece not once, but 3 times until we were both satisfied with it.

I always appreciate feedback. Please feel free to leave your thought–the good AND the bad–in a comment.

Thanks for stopping by!

 

26 Responses

  1. LDiggitty says:

    I really enjoyed it, but her name threw me off. Penelope Fries? Is there something I’m missing here? I guess I just didn’t feel it matched the story, but it’s such a small detail and the story itself is extremely well written so no biggie!

    • SAM says:

      I think you may be right. This story took on some changes as we went along, and the Penelope no longer has a mate. Duly noted and changed. 😉 Thanks!

  2. Sheilagh Lee says:

    wow quite the story.

  3. Ellecee says:

    Wow, quite the story or episode. How many have had a dream like this but to carry it off – well that’s another story. Yours – well written.

  4. Andy Sewina says:

    woW! Scary stuff! I think the moral here is don’t go to that school re-union!

    Nicely written!!

  5. Carrie says:

    Ah, yes. One thing I always forgot to mention: that name just did not work 🙂 I like the new one.

    I do love how you can do the more scary, horror filled stories. Definitely your strength 🙂

  6. Tara R. says:

    That was intense. I think I held my breathe the entire story.

  7. jesterqueen says:

    Yah! That was awesome. I love the twists here. At first, I thought the revenge was perhaps no longer being a geek, walking in and attracting that football player that everybody wanted. But it seemed like life had dealt him a pretty hard hand there, so when it came out that he was her friend’s rapist and the cause of her suicide, I felt the last gap of understanding close. Click. Got it. Bye David. Have a nice afterlife if you do it.

  8. Morgan Dragonwillow (@MDragonwillow) says:

    I think it makes me a little nervous reading something this dark because I know I have a darker side and have had thoughts that, well could raise the hair on your arms. Well written.

    Peace,
    Morgan

  9. lexy3587 says:

    Ooh, a lot of emotion in this! Really well-written scene of revenge. And it gives you enough background about the guy to feel absolutely no pity for him.

    • SAM says:

      Thank you. Your assurance that you have the right amount of info is much appreciated. I’m glad you enjoyed the story.

  10. SAM~
    This is Great! Sadistic and out for revenge, Miranda certainly goes for her prey. I like narrators cool calculating style. The pacing of the story is top-notch. Clearly you’ve spent a lot of time writing and polishing this piece. 🙂

    Having another reader edit and give feedback on a piece of writing makes a difference. My daughter is involved in writing sites directed at teens. She is a beta reader, meaning others send her their pieces to read. She edits and comments on the pieces before the writer posts their work. I wish there were and adult version of beta readers.

    Is the Carrie who edited this piece the same Carrie above in the comments section?
    I’m working on this prompt for Story Dam also, but I’m not sure my entry will be finished by Sunday. Do you want to read it over for me before I post?

    • SAM says:

      Yes, it is the one and only Carrie ;). She was absolutely fabulous about turning around quickly for me and re-editing. She helped me cut this from 1000+ to a little over 700 and it wasn’t even painful.

      And I would be happy to read it over for you. Send it to my email: theauthorSAM@gmail.com

      Do you tweet?

  11. delightfully dark. well executed.

  12. Kir says:

    Oh wow, the way you writ just pulls a reader in. It’s so effortless (and for that I am truly jealous). Plus you took all those prompts and gave us a hell of a story.

    Carrie rocks too..:)

  13. Wow that was dark, but I loved it. In all honesty I found myself cheering her on when you reveal why she’s doing it. Great job!

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