Get Over It, Mom!
When my daughter rages it can often feel like she’s out to kill me a personal attack. Some of the words she throws at me are so venomous and laden with hate they feel like physical blows. It’s so very hard not to get caught up in the storm. The desire to spit the hateful words back can be overwhelming (I am not proud of feeling that way). I have to swallow the words like so much bile. I have to replace them with words of love, of calmness and peace.
I find myself looking into vacant eyes, trying desperately to play peacemaker even as I am attacked repeatedly. When she escalates into breaking things (this degree of escalation is now few and far between) my main focus is keeping her from hurting herself on shards of glass.
And then, like wind disappearing from the sails of a boat. She’s done. It’s over. She turns doe eyes to me. She opens her arms seeking an embrace, an oasis from her self-created storm. She whispers words of love beseechingly, almost begging for it.
[bctt tweet=”And, what is a mother to do? There’s no secret trick here. ” username=”OurWriteSide”]
And, what is a mother to do? There’s no secret trick here. No qualified advice from an overpaid expert. There is only her and I. I wrap my arms around her and tell her I love her. We don’t talk about the mean words that were said. She has all but forgotten the fit. An emotional seizure some call it. And I do the only thing I can. I get over it. I let it go.
Does your child have rages or fits? There are lots of ways to help them calm down and planning can help prevent some meltdowns.
If you’re angry at a loved one, hug that person. And mean it. You may not want to hug – which is all the more reason to do so. It’s hard to stay angry when someone shows they love you, and that’s precisely what happens when we hug each other. ~Walter Anderson, The Confidence Course: Seven Steps to Self-Fulfillment
Until next time, scribe happy and stay sassy,